What Is a Rainbow Baby? (Pregnancy After Loss)

26 Comments

1. Taylor Oct 25 at 9:37 am

   I got pregnant in December 2018, and lost the baby in January 2019. I didn’t know I was pregnant until I miscarried. It was very traumatizing. Then a few months later I went on to have a stroke at 21 years old. It took me a while to recover, like about 2 years. I found out I have a gene mutation called MTHFR mutation that is very common but highly under-diagnosed. 70% if the world has at least 1 copy. My husband also has this mutation. Our son has 2 mutated copies unfortunately. It was a major cause of the miscarriage and the stroke. When I got pregnant again I had to be put on different prenatals that contained methyl folate instead of synthetic folic acid because it would poison me and risk another miscarriage or other horrible problems. I finally had my rainbow baby May 2022. He’s a baby boy named Titus. He is a blessing from God. I almost lost Titus at 24 weeks most likely due to a partial placental detachment but thankfully he was ok. Later on we found out he had in-uterine growth restriction and had to be induced at 37 weeks. He is 5 months old now. He is thriving and doing well. His weight still has to catch up but he is very strong.

   Reply

2. Margarita Vasquez Nov 29 at 1:09 am

   Lost my daughter May 20, 2018 at 38 weeks full term. This is my rainbow baby born May 26, 2020. He turned 6 months on Thanksgiving. I had a dream one month before I lost my girl. I knew something happened to the baby and kept asking where is she? A voice spoke and told me you didn’t have a girl you have a boy and his name is Jordan!” So meet my Jordan Leonidas. My daughters name was Moriah Faith. In Hebrew Moriah means God teaches, that year we lost our home, car, jobs, opportunities to move into any new home, my daughter and almost myself with her, and the last of our finances on the funeral, casket, burial ceremony etc. We’re still homeless but thankful to stay with family while we save up and thankful for this little guy right here. Through it all, God taught us Faith in him alone. So Moriah FAITH was born. And left us with the gift of LOVE. After everything goes all that remains is Love. That’s why we smile, that why we cry, that’s what’s worth fighting for, protecting, and even dying for. We would sacrifice everything for Love, sounds pretty familar right. ????

   Reply

3. KP Nov 22 at 7:22 am

   Just had a missed miscarriage at 11 weeks. Went to doctor yesterday for ultrasound and they didn’t detect a heartbeat. Doctor asked me to go for a D & C as I didn’t bleed. Don’t know what caused it. This is my first pregnancy at age 34.

   Reply

4. Jason Long Oct 16 at 9:04 am

   I’m 17 and a couple of years ago I found out that I’m a rainbow baby. I just want to say that the child born as a rainbow baby may feel confused if they find out. I personally began to question my own existence. Be careful how you tell them, and be prepared to tell your child that they are wanted, they are loved, and most of all that they are supposed to be alive. Before I really understood what this was all about I had a lot of bad thoughts that I regret. Don’t let that happen to your rainbow baby.

   Reply

5. Maggie Jul 11 at 5:57 pm

   I just found out a few days ago that I am pregnant again! I am super excited and nervous. My sunshine baby is 13. My second baby, Georgia, was born prematurely and died at 5 days old in May of last year. This past March I found out I was pregnant again, but unfortunately miscarried at 8 weeks. Trying to not panic over everything is the hardest thing. My mind keeps worrying about every possible way this could go wrong. All we want is to have a baby we don’t have to give back. Saying prayers this little bug sticks around ❤️?????

   Reply

6. Mary Francese Jul 11 at 12:18 am

   My husband and I lost our identical twin girls 3 weeks ago. I was 18 weeks and 3 days pregnant. The day before we lost them, I had TTTS laser surgery performed.

   The night of surgery the girls were doing amazing. Strong, steady heartbeats, and they were moving around like crazy. The fluid levels evened out as well. The doctor, as well as us, were so hopeful that they’d be okay.

   The next morning we had another ultrasound done. The tech- only minutes into the scan, ran out of the room to get the doctor. My heart sank. I knew something was wrong. I panicked, I was shaking, I was scared for what news we were about to receive.

   We knew there would be a 50 percent chance we could lose one baby. We also knew there was a ten percent chance we could lose both. We never ever expected to lose both of the girls. The doctor came in, not looking too chipper. Once she scanned the babies and told me she was so sorry, I lost it. It was the worst pain that’s ever hit me in my entire life.

   I have a living son, he’s 11 years old. His birthday was the following Monday after I had the DNE done. It was so hard for me to enjoy his birthday, because I know I’ll never be able to celebrate my girls’ birthday with them.

   So.. now my husband and I patiently wait for my normal period. We do both want to try again. I’m scared. I’m petrified of all of the what if’s I know I already ask. I’m not even pregnant yet, and I’m worried. I want, more than anything, to have a baby with my husband. My son is from a previous relationship. I already warned my OB that when the time comes I’ll probably be calling multiple times a week in fear of every ache and pain I experience. Will this concern get worse when I’m pregnant?

   Reply

   • Team Mama Natural Jul 12 at 10:04 pm

     So very sorry for your loss. Those feelings will likely come up once you become pregnant again. If you’re not already, I highly recommend seeking out a therapist trained in pregnancy loss. Hiring a doula could also prove helpful, they could help answer the burning questions you have when your provider is not reachable. Best of luck to you and thanks for sharing your story ❤️

     Reply

7. Susan Nov 10 at 7:29 pm

   I am so incredibly blessed. My oldest is a rainbow baby, he is 8. I had 2 miscarriages before him. The professionals tell you to look to your mother to determine your fertility, and we still don’t know how my mom got me (several years of taking fertility drugs, and none when she somehow conceived me). We figured it wouldn’t happen, but we were able to have him. Then we had 2 pretty girls, another miscarriage and rainbow boy, who is now 3, another baby boy who is 19 months, 2 more miscarriages, and another sweet rainbow boy die in February. There is no explanation for my come and go fertility, but we love every one of our children!

   Reply

8. Lauren Aug 18 at 5:40 pm

   My rainbow baby is due in the next week or so and like your article mentioned it is a rollercoaster of emotions when you find out you are expecting after loss. It is never just the innocent joy you felt prior to the loss because you have the tragic what if looming over you. Once I made it to full term I felt the other confusing emotions of happiness and relief but also not wanting to forget my first precious child turned angel. Anytime a stranger asks if this is my first child I want to say technically no but don’t want to get into it with a stranger so I just say yes.

   I had a missed miscarriage which means I had no symptoms and I feel like I found out in the worst possible way, when my husband and I went in for a ultrasound only for the tech to realize there was no heartbeat and then tell us the devastating news. To make matters worse my body did nothing so I had to go in to the hospital and have a D&C to remove the baby from my womb. I don’t wish this experience or pain on anyone and I will never forget my first baby who I know was a girl. Anytime I share that we lost our first it never fails that the woman I share it with shares a miscarriage story too. I plan to take photos of our rainbow baby and incorporate a rainbow in one of his photos and share on social media to share our story with others. If our pain can help someone else it will have been worth it. Women shouldn’t feel they can’t share their miscarriage stories and sharing your rainbow baby is a positive way to open the conversation.

   Reply

9. Annika Aug 9 at 3:06 am

   Dear Genevieve,
   I received your newsletter during my pregnancy. My baby was moving a lot. He was laying in transverse position and I did all the exercises I could to get him to turn. We did an ECV, external version, in week 36 and he moved without problems and stayed head down. I was so relieved, looking forward to a natural birth. I was just going to write to you, give you a feedback to please mention monitoring fetal movement/counting kicks, when I thought: I’m just gonna check if she really didn’t say anything about it in the newsletter. I came across this and was still convinced you had not mentioned it in the newsletter. No one ever told me about the importance of fetal movements. Had I been aware, my son would most probably be here today. So I found it in Newsletter of Week 31, along with the topic of how to flip breech. I felt really sad. I must have skimmed through and looked more deeply into the other topic. Yes, it says if baby doesnt move for an hour or two call your midwife. But that passed my brain unnoticed, because he was so active all the time, it wasn’t an issue for me. 7 days after the external version all was fine, supposedly. They did only one doppler throughout the pregancy, in week 21, all seemingly perfect. So the night of the 9th to 10th day after the turning of the child he wa overly active for one night. I did wonder a bit but discarded it. Also, since turning him he had reduced movements. Then the movements nearly stopped and then completely stopped. It took us quite long to realize and wonder and call my midwife. Maybe 48 hours after the last kick, the last we consciously remember. Figure that. I’m well informed, well educated. I soaked up all information I could get. Yeah maybe not in touch enough with my intuition or also let’s say just carefree, trusting, because supposedly all was well. My son passed at 37+5, I assume. I just did not pay any close attention to when and how much he had moved, except for being joyful and touching my belly when he did, but not thinking anything of when he did less. I thought it had to do with the changed position. Here we are, my husband and me struggling a great deal. This is tough. I miss him.
   Genevieve, please, I know we don’t want to scare women, but please do not mention it just as a sidenote. The carefree way of writing was just too casual to reach me. Btw as a non-native I remember I also didn’t know what OJ meant and was confused about that, which distracted me from the message as well…
   Thanks for the work you do,
   Annika

   Reply

   • Annika Aug 9 at 3:13 am

     I forgot to add: obduction showed the placenta had a limited diffusion capacity thus not providing him sufficiently towards the end of pregnancy when his needs were bigger. There was no way to know though. For some reason that I still don’t understand, he was normal in size, slim but in normal range, and we only found out later his organs were a bit smaller (about 3 weeks smaller in gestational age than his body). He would have lived well and normally and caught up though.

     Reply

10. Carol Aug 8 at 12:25 pm

    I lost my forth baby at 20 weeks. It feels almost greedy or indulgent telling my story as I am blessed with 3 gorgeous, healthy children. This pregnancy and loss was a miracle in itself however, it acted like crowbar and forced me to open up and address and heal deep old wounds that I would potentially never have dealt with any other way. The birth process was also bitterly ironic as I did it alone at home, naturally, a small triumph in the bleakness after 3 c-sections. One of the most difficult parts of this experience was telling people that I’d miscarried and having to deal with their grief, it was really challenging. This process taught me so much about how to really support people in the grieving process. I am now pregnant again… to put it mildly this pregnancy is a huge HUGE surprise, I had really reconciled myself to not having anymore children, it’s early days still and I’m really struggling with doubt and disbelief. Much love to the other brave mamas here!!!

    Reply

11. Amanda Yates Aug 1 at 12:49 pm

    My first pregnancy in 2014 ended in a miscarriage at 11 weeks. A year later I was pregnant again with my Rainbow baby. Throughout my entire pregnancy with my Son I was a basket case. We went to L&D all the time just to settle my nerves. He has been a true blessing to our family. During my pregnancy I finally realized that the timing of my first pregnancy was not right and that everything happens for a reason.

    Two Weeks ago we experience the loss of another baby at 12 weeks. This time around the grieving is even harder as we saw the babies heart beat 3 weeks prior. Knowing that this angel was here and now is gone is the hardest part. I am trying to remember that everything happens for a reason, and to cherish my Son even more. This post really helped me feel like there is a community out there that I can lean to for support.

    Thank you.

    Reply

12. Meagan Lee Aug 1 at 11:39 am

    At 21 I had my first child stillborn. I was 24 weeks pregnant and she didn’t even weigh a pound. We named her Holly Sophia. Fast forward to 7 years later and I’m about to have my third rainbow baby. She was my only girl. I’ve got all boys now! Being so young and having such a horrible loss was terrifying. I feel like the important thing to remember is not to expect to get back to “normal”. That normal doesn’t exist. I read a quote once that said something along the lines of “there are moments where you realize nothing will ever be the same. Time is divided into ‘before this, and after this'”. And that is so true. There’s before I had holly, and after. But after has been beautiful too.

    Reply

13. Allison Aug 1 at 11:30 am

    In March of this year we found out we had lost our little daughter (our 3rd child) at around 20 weeks. It was so shocking and unexplained. I was induced to give birth to her, and even though she was tiny the birth was just as intense as my first two. We felt the peace of God so strongly through it all, though, and still do as we continue to heal. I just found out I am pregnant again, a bit sooner than we expected, and am afraid to let myself get too excited, but praying this one will be born happy and healthy!

    Reply

14. Hannah Sjogren Jul 27 at 3:19 pm

    My second child, my son Hudson, was born at 39 weeks via C-Section. We knew from 14 weeks pregnant that he had Trisomy 18. We chose a C-section so that we could meet him alive. And we did. He wasn’t breathing at first but after 30 minutes he started breathing on his own and did so for 8 hours. After 8.5 hours of a beautiful life he went to the arms of Jesus. 11 months after Hudson’s birthday my daughter Keziah was born. It was a completely unexpected pregnancy. At first I wasn’t ready and I cried, I was still deep in grief. But her little life has been incredibly healing. On Hudson’s first birthday Keziah was about 3 weeks old. Holding her in my arms while I remembered Hudson was a beautiful gift I could not have imagined. I also have a 3 year old who has walked this journey out with us too. She knows about Hudson and remembers meeting him in the hospital. His pictures are on our walls so he will not be forgotten…. I love you my little boy!

    Reply

    • Genevieve Mama Natural Aug 1 at 10:57 am

      Precious ? What a gift to hold him… and you will again. Xo

      Reply

    • Amber Mendez Apr 26 at 11:05 am

      Its really difficult to lose a child to Trisomy 18. We lost our son at 29 weeks and 5 days. We named him Isaiah. He too was diagnosed with Trisomy 18 and had many birth defect . but that didn’t stop us from loving him nor did it stop him from growing . Isaiah was born on February 22nd 2018 he weighed just shy of 2 pounds. He was perfect. We did everything we could trying to give Isaiah a chance at life unfortunately he passed in utero. you were truly lucky to have met your beautiful baby even though it was a short time. those are such Precious Memories. I wished so hard to have seen my son in his eyes and to have him look at me. I’m too scared to try to get pregnant again losing a baby is a pain I don’t know I could handle again.

      Reply

15. Erin Jul 27 at 3:07 pm

    Our first pregnancy ended in miscarriage. When I got pregnant with our daughter, I wasn’t online much, and had never heard of the term “rainbow baby.” Once I did learn it, though, I told her that’s what she was, and she thinks it’s the best thing ever. lol. I’ve had five successful pregnancies since then.

    One thing I would just say to partners and family members and even caregivers during a woman’s first (second, third) post-loss pregnancy would be to be patient. I know I was an absolute basket case during my daughter’s pregnancy. Every twinge, cramp, or tug was enough to send me into panic mode. It was by far the most stressful of my pregnancies.

    I would also just say to validate that, no matter how early in the pregnancy the loss occurred, a child has been lost. Not a clump of cells. Not what “would have been” a “real baby” as someone so delicately put it to me. A baby. Let her know he/she mattered and that you remember the pregnancy and child. Even if you never saw him/her. My mom has Christmas ornaments and other keepsakes to memorialize the baby we lost and she still thinks of that baby as one of her grandchildren. It’s nice that someone other than me remembers.

    I also just really wish it was considered normal to mention thinking about them. Like, not in a depressed way. But, if sometimes crosses my mind that he would have been this old or that I just passed my would-have-been due date. I’m not sobbing about it. I’m not depressed. It’s just remembering something about one of my kids the same I would any of them. I wish I could mention it at times without people assuming I’m in a bad place or something.

    Reply

    • Genevieve Mama Natural Aug 1 at 10:59 am

      So true. I love your mom’s perspective. I do believe we will meet those babies again on the other side. ??

      Reply

16. Courtney Jul 27 at 2:17 pm

    In January 2016 I had a stillborn at 21weeks 5 days. We are unsure of what happened. I had a dr apt Wednesday and everything was fine, went to OB ED Saturday and found out that our baby boy, Myles, had no heartbeat. I was induced that night and he was born sleeping the next afternoon. We did not have funeral services for him but he was cremated and me and.my husband both have necklaces with some of his ashes in them. Our August 2014 LO has a build a bear with Myles heartbeat in it. We waited several months to start trying for our rainbow. We got pregnant in June 2016 and miscarried then got pregnant again in July 2016 and miscarried. I underwent several tests and everything was coming back normal except for a clotting factor. I was put on 2 baby aspirin daily and found out I was expecting again in November 2016. We just welcomed our sweet rainbow baby, Charlotte, on July 10 2017. She is so beautiful and peaceful. I believe that her angel siblings were watching over her the whole pregnancy. I had many anxieties the entire pregnancy but everything was perfect. Prayers and faith kept us all going. ❤

    Reply

    • Genevieve Mama Natural Aug 1 at 11:01 am

      What a journey… that must have been heart wrenching. So glad you have your Charlotte, your angel babies and the aspirin solution.

      Reply

17. Amanda Jul 27 at 1:49 pm

    I experienced two miscarriages and now have my rainbow baby, Josiah. My pregnancy with him was emotional and difficult but he is such a blessing! I actually started a local nonprofit called Sent from Heaven with a friend. We create care packages for families when they lose a child. It’s a heartbreaking but beautiful ministry. You can read my full story and my cofounder’s on our website.

    Reply

    • Genevieve Mama Natural Aug 1 at 11:01 am

      So beautiful! Love your ministry’s name… perfect!

      Reply

18. Melissa Jul 27 at 1:24 pm

    I’m a rainbow mama with twins. 🙂 I miscarried with my third pregnancy. Precious baby was around 5-6 weeks but miscarried around 7-8 I was heartbroken as was my husband. It was such a sad and emotional time for us. This was in May 2012. I had a 6 mo journey of regulating my hormones after the mistake of taking Methotrexate. I felt pressured by the doctor to take it even though my heart was saying not to. It was horrible. It made me feel so sick. I took supplements to get my folic acid stores up and regulate my body as it was so off. Accupunture was a God send! Then we found out we were expecting again in Oct 2012. In Nov we found out it was twins! Ahhhh! It was such a surprise! And an amazing blessing. Funny story was I prayed and asked God for twins and his will of course. I just felt gee we are older and if it’s a girl we’d try again for a boy so we can pass on my husbands name and it would just be so awesome if we can have a girl and a boy. That way I didn’t have to wait for my stores to replenish. Well that prayer was answered a girl and a boy. 41 weeks and 3 days later He was 8.13 and she was 7.9! Now they are 4yrs old!

    Reply

    • Genevieve Mama Natural Aug 1 at 11:11 am

      What a double blessing! Thanks for sharing your story as it helps other mamas. And way to go… those were some big twin babies!

      Reply

Add Comment