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When did you realize you were really in labor?
When my water broke!! :)
On Friday, 1/6/17, I woke up when my husband, Dale, left for work at around 7:30 am and got my day started. I had a lot of energy and had a lot to get done to prepare for my mom’s visit—she was coming up in preparation for the baby’s arrival—and the snowstorm. I went to the grocery store to pick up a couple of meals and some snacks for the next few days in case the snow really was bad enough that we were snowed in.
At 2:00 pm I picked mom up and was so relived to have her here safe and sound before the snowstorm. We went home and mom napped all afternoon while I worked on preparing for an interview I had scheduled for Monday. For about two hours starting at around 7:30 pm and as I prepped for the interview the baby was going absolutely crazy in my stomach. She was kicking like I had never felt her before—hard, uncomfortable kicks that just kept coming! I thought it might be the barometric pressure dropping that was making her do these crazy acrobats—little did I know what was to come!
Dale and I touched based a few times and as it turned out it was looking like he wouldn’t have to plow the snow after all—something he would typically have to do as part of his job responsibilities but was able to get out of with my due date being so close. I was so happy about that! He got home around 8:45 pm or so.
Around 9:20 pm I felt a small gush of fluid that felt like my period was starting so I stood up to go to the bathroom and see what was going on. As I walked across the living room more liquid started running down my leg. I kind of freaked out and said to mom and Dale “um guys, something is happening!” I had soaked through my underwear and my pj bottoms. There was light pink liquid running down my legs and more gushed out when I peed. My water had broken! I was freaking out telling mom and Dale this can’t be happening—I have an interview scheduled!!! We texted our doula and midwife to let them know what was happening. Our midwife suggested laying down and trying to get some rest before labor really picked up. So that’s exactly what we did. Mom and Dale set up our bed with several layers of sheets and a mattress cover to protect the mattress. Mom stayed up watching TV in the living room on the couch and Dale and I went to lay down for a while despite it still being pretty early in the evening. I wasn’t tired but I was certainly freaking out about what was to come and if I would have the energy to endure it after the running around I did all day.
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
I really struggled with my contractions once they picked up mostly because the baby was really low in my pelvis which caused me to have the urge to push really early on. I also had convinced myself that labor would be intense but not super painful because I had such a good "tool box" to help (i.e. home birth, doula, supportive husband, hypnobabies) however, it was much much more painful than I ever anticipated. Below I share a section of my birth story that highlights how challenging coping with contractions was....
When we first laid down my contractions felt like mild period cramps—nothing I couldn’t handle. I listened to Hypnobabies to help me get to sleep. I slept off and on, getting up pretty regularly to pee. The cramps started to pick up in frequency and intensity so Dale started timing them to see how far apart they were. I think initially they were about 20 minutes apart and lasting maybe 30 seconds but as they picked up in intensity they started getting closer together. Around midnight they were lasting longer—90 seconds at a time and coming closer together maybe every five minutes or so and I was having to really work to breath through them. Dale was great at helping me stay focused. He would tell me I was doing a good job and let me know once I was at the halfway point of each contraction. I know he was also keeping our doula and midwife up to date during this time as well but things were at a point where I really wasn’t aware of what was going on. I was just working to make it through each contraction. Then they became really intense—lasting three minutes each. The Hypnobabies tracks weren’t working through these longer ones and I was becoming more and more vocal. My mom at some point came back to the bedroom to check on me because I was beginning to moan and cry out pretty loudly. Dale called our midwife and let her know things were getting intense. She said that my contractions were doing something called “doubling up” and she suggested that I get in the bath tub to see if we could slow them down some since she was struggling to get to our house with all the snow.
So my mom got the bath going for me and we transitioned to the bathroom. The walk from the bedroom to the bathroom was not fun as I had a ton of pressure in my bottom and I had to stop a few times to wait out a contraction. The bath water felt nice at first but very quickly started causing my contractions to come closer together. Then with each contraction I started having the urge to push. I didn’t know what to do. Our midwife and doula hadn’t arrived. I could sense that my mom and Dale were panicking. My mom was helping me back to the bedroom and Dale went to call our doula and midwife again. Just as he did our doula arrived--I had never been so happy to see someone in my life!
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
I did a TON to prepare for my birth from reading everything I could get my hands on related to natural childbirth to taking a six week Hypnobabies class to listening to every podcast I could find focused on natural birth and creating a homebirth space filled with calming reminders and affirmations to surround me during labor. However, the absolute best thing I did was putting together an amazing birth team! Hiring a midwife and doula who I connected with, who listened to me, and who believed in me was what helped give me the strength to continue when I didn't think I could any longer. These amazing women along with my husband and mom helped me through one of the most intense experiences of my life. They all understood my vision, they knew what I wanted my birth to be like, and we were all on the same page as to how best to make it come to fruition. It was because of their love and constant support that I was able to birth my baby in the comfort of my own home.
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What surprised you about your birth?
How incredibly intense it was and the immense relief I felt as soon as my baby girl was born! It was love at first sight and the discomfort I had felt just minutes before melted away as I held my baby for the first time.
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The people you have in your birth space should be people who are working to help you achieve the birth experience that YOU want! I would highly recommend researching the birth professionals you hire, interview them before hiring them, ask tons of questions, and if at any point you feel they will not support you the way you want to be supported find someone else! Also, hire a doula--they are worth their weight in gold!!
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
Once my doula arrived she really helped me to focus my energy. Instead of yelling out and grunting she encouraged me to say/moan "open" and envision my body opening as my baby moved down. This was super helpful! I made the most progress once I was able to do this. It helped me go from feeling out of control to focused and more calm. It was also nice to be in the warm water in the bath and birth tub.
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What position did you end up delivering in?
I delivered my baby on my hands and knees in the birth tub. This position really helped relieve the pressure in my upper arms that I had been using in other positions. It also helped me to better curl around my belly so my pushes were more effective.
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
I felt intense relief that the hard part was over and an immediate sense of love like nothing I have ever felt before! I was so incredibly happy to be holding her and just wanted to study every inch of her! She was absolutely perfect!!
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What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?
The people you have in your birth space should be people who are working to help you achieve the birth experience that YOU want! I would highly recommend researching the birth professionals you hire, interview them before hiring them, ask tons of questions, and if at any point you feel they will not support you the way you want to be supported find someone else! Also, hire a doula--they are worth their weight in gold!!
