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When did you realize you were really in labor?
After a totally normal vaginal delivery of my first baby I was shocked to find my waters had broken at 32 weeks along with my hopes of a smooth natural birth. I was taken to hospital where I was given steriod shots to prepare my babies lungs and a raft of anti biotics to limit any infection on top of which I tested positive for strep b- hence more antibiotics. After 24 hours monitoring I wasn't actively contracting so sent home on strict bed rest to try and prolong gestation till ideally 33/34 weeks.
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
Once the above had taken place,my natural birth ideal was no longer an option and after a week on bed rest I was readmitted at 33 weeks with bleeding and a touch of sepsis , induced then my son, Felix was delivered via emergency C-section under general anesthesia! My experience was as far from natural as possible but a testament to letting go and taking a new road when circumstances dictate it.
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IMG_3111
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
Once I knew I would be delivering early I tried to prepare for the possibility of having a premature baby and the specific challenges we could face and how I could prepare mentally for what lay ahead.
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What surprised you about your birth?
The speed at which circumstances change and immediate Emergency intervention can be required. Having vide red shouted around you and a room full of people, covered in wires was an incredibly frightening and intense experience.
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Things can change in such a short space of time and you have to take steps to ensure the safety of your self and your baby . Once that little baby is in your arms and the destination is reached the journey which you took to get there becomes secondary.
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
Once I was induced I was given an epidural so felt no pain ( I had had a cervical stitch in from 17 weeks which was removed at speed without any anesthesia before induction as it was tearing and was EXTREMELY painful)
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What position did you end up delivering in?
Unfortunately I was under general anesthetic
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
The most distressing part of my whole experience was when I came round from the GA and my husband showed my a photo of Felix in the NICU incubator. He Looked like a strangers baby and I experienced a wave of awful emotion that I felt no bond with him, guilt at these terrible feelings and a griping fee that I was going to die as I had infection and an elevated heart rate with uncontrollable shaking and leave my first child and husband alone. It wasn't until later that day when I was taken to the NICU to see him that I was overwhelmed with love for him. Despite my C section I was howling like an animal in the room as i pressed my face to the plastic incubator to see him and held his tiny hand through the opening. As soon as I could hold him we lay skin to skin and I could stroke him. I can still smell him, that new baby smell mixed with antibiotics and milk.
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What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?
I was and still am an advocate of choice in childbirth and can testify, with experience of both paths that the natural approach in my opinion is preferable however I would caveat that by advising mums to be prepared to deviate if necessary. Things can change in such a short space of time and you have to take steps to ensure the safety of your self and your baby . Once that little baby is in your arms and the destination is reached the journey which you took to get there becomes secondary.
