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When did you realize you were really in labor?
The night before I went into labor, I felt the strong urge to walk at a very fast pace. I was almost one full week past my due date, and had been dilated to 5cm and 80% effaced for over 2 weeks, so I hoped that by walking, I would go into labor. I was having strong contractions every 3 minutes through the entire one hour walk. I even jogged a little! But, as soon as I ended my walk, my contractions petered out. I went to bed disappointed. The next morning, I woke up with a distinct achiness low and deep in my uterus. Typically throughout the third trimester, I would wake up feeling fine but as the day wore on I would become more uncomfortable. When I woke up that morning and was already in discomfort, I realized something was different. I had an appointment at 10am and had some bloody show while I was there. On the drive home, around 11:30am, I had to grip my steering wheel and breathe through my first contractions of active labor. When I arrived home, my husband and midwife joined me. I was still in a pleasant mood, though I was nervous about what was ahead. I bounced on my birth ball and began having more painful contractions, to the point where talking and being distracted by conversation was annoying. I tried different positions, but what was most comfortable was the "labor slow dance" position. I draped my arms over my husband's shoulders and swayed, bracing myself against him when the contractions peaked. By this time it we about 2:00pm and things were getting serious. I decided to take a shower, and just for good measure, Hubby joined and we did the deed ?. After that, my contractions were so powerful that I felt as if getting out of the shower and to the hospital would be too difficult (even though the hospital is walking distance from our home!) My husband helped me out of the shower and I told my midwife that we needed to be in delivery within the hour. We called my mother in law who hurried to pick my 4 year old son up from school. He arrived at home so excited and we got ready to head over to the hospital. By this time, I felt the urge to be very vocal during my contractions, and felt like I was "in the zone." All modesty had gone out the window - I didn't care how crazy I looked or sounded, I was about to have this baby! We arrived at the hospital at 3:45pm, and I was holding on for dear life! I didn't want my husband out of arms reach, because it felt like the only way I could get through each contraction was to hold him as my anchor. When I got checked into triage, I was at 8cm. I declined the epidural. I was going to do this all natural, and it was such a rush! I remember thinking, "there's no going back now!" By the time I got moved to my delivery room, it was like a scene from a movie. I was intensely laboring like a wild Momma Bear! I got on my hands and knees in the bed, gripping the head rest. My husband was still by my side. The doctor arrived and told me I needed one or two more good contractions before pushing. That was hard to hear, because I was exhausted and scared and ready to push! Finally, I remember saying, "I think I need to push, but I can't tell!" Then I said, "I NEED TO PUSH!" Honestly, pushing the first few times wasnt bad, it just felt like intense pressure. My stomach was clinched up and I felt all my muscles forcing downward. About 4 pushes in, I could tell the baby was in my birth canal, and I remember thinking "why on Earth didn't I get the epidural!?!?" There was a brief moment of panic when it sunk in - only one thing could get me through this - more pushing! I took a deep breath and did 3 more 10 count pushes. There were so many nurses in the room cheering me on - many of them later told us that this was their first time witnessing a natural birth on hands and knees! I mustered the last of my strength and pushed as hard as I could, and screamed like a WILD ANIMAL! My voice was totally guttural and primal. Finally, I felt the pressure release, and saw the doctor lay my baby on the bed! It was over! I was kind of in shock -several moments passed before I was able to mentally come back to my body and change positions. I held my baby and my husband and 4 year old son joined me at my bedside. I HAD DONE IT! It was the greatest rush of my entire life.
Since my natural birth, I feel transformed as a woman. I've heard other women say things like "you don't get a trophy for going natural" but I beg to differ! There is a reason why women who have experienced natural birth willingly become part of a collective tribe. It's the closest you can get to life on the other side of the metaphorical veil, and it takes courage and spirit to walk directly into the intensity and pain and embrace the experience. I'm so proud of myself, still when I think about it I get goosebumps! Natural birth definitely takes you to the edge and back, but it's so so worth it.
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
The unknown! And at times the pain felt almost too much to bear.
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
Mental preparation. Visualizing my transformation and what it represented to me. Also, I only exposed myself to natural birth information throughout my entire pregnancy and watched tons of natural birth videos.
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What surprised you about your birth?
Nothing really! It was all so unknown and new to me, but honestly it happened exactly how I guessed it would. I had a feeling it would be fast, loud, raw, and intense, and it was all of that and more!
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Follow your heart and your instincts. You can do this. You are a goddess of strength and power. You will be changed forever - this is what your body was divinely made for - nothing short of a total miracle.
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
Holding onto my husband during contractions. Counter pressure, being on hands and knees, being vocal.
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What position did you end up delivering in?
Hands and knees, holding onto the hospital bed.
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
I was still in shock! But I was euphoric and relieved.
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What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?
Follow your heart and your instincts. You can do this. You are a goddess of strength and power. You will be changed forever - this is what your body was divinely made for - nothing short of a total miracle.
