Meditating and Doing Deep Breathing Exercises Helped Mellisa During Her Home Birth

When did you realize you were really in labor?

I had several days of start and stop labor that was pretty intense, typically kicking up at night and dying out in the morning. The day it stuck around in the morning is when I knew this was really it...

What was the most challenging thing about going natural?

I have experienced back labor during all 3 of my births, and this time was no exception. My daughter was posterior until about an hour before birth, and that back pain is the hardest part for me! There just isn't any relief from it, and it really wears on you. I definitely had my moments during transition where I was sure I couldn't do it.

What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?

Meditating and doing deep breathing exercises in the days/weeks before birth were the most impactful for me. Whenever I would get anxious, impatient or uncomfortable I would meditate (and usually fall asleep). I found it very refreshing and healing. During the days of start/stop labor before the real deal, I found this to be even more helpful - deep breathing got me through those nights of contractions and I was surprisingly well rested each morning considering the intensity of the contractions. I jokingly called it "hypno-sleeping" - I felt like each contraction was like a wave that would jolt me awake when it started and then push me back to sleep as it ended, almost beyond my control.

What surprised you about your birth?

This was my first home birth, after a hospital birth and an intended birth center birth that ended up in a hospital birth and devastating stillbirth. I spent a lot of time making the decision on where to give birth this time, and initially was going to plan another birth center birth. I surprised myself first by deciding that I just didn't want to leave home and all of it's comfort, and by sticking with that decision even through several moments of fear and uncertainty. During the birth, I was surprised by how similar the physical sensations were to birthing in a less desirable setting, but how different my mental and emotional state was despite how hard labor is. I had hoped giving birth at home would actually be less painful, and I can't say it was, but it was ultimately much less mentally and emotionally exhausting. And the best part was after - not having to go anywhere or do anything or fill out any forms or get poked and prodded... truly.

You are definitely stronger than you know. Our every day environments and situations don't teach or show us what we truly have within us - but it's there. Open yourself up to the experience - to the intensity and even the pain. It is the most purposeful thing you will ever encounter.

What pain relief strategies worked best?

I found counter pressure on my low back and hips to be the most helpful with my back labor. I also spent a lot of time in the tub and wanted it as hot as they would let it get. :)

What position did you end up delivering in?

I had hoped to deliver in the water but due to a few last minute hiccups, I needed to move to the bed we'd set up in the living room so my midwives could manage things better. She was born on our bed and I was more or less reclined with some assisted squatting during pushes.

How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?

I have never felt anything like that moment. The last time a baby was on my chest that baby didn't take his first breath. When my daughter was born I was overcome with joy and disbelief that she was here and alive and healthy. I didn't let anybody else hold her for hours. It still feels like that now at 6 weeks - I just don't want to let her go.

What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?

You are definitely stronger than you know. Our every day environments and situations don't teach or show us what we truly have within us - but it's there. Open yourself up to the experience - to the intensity and even the pain. It is the most purposeful thing you will ever encounter.