Harmony's Peaceful Unassisted Home Birth

When did you realize you were really in labor?

About 2:30 am, when I woke up shaking my leg, trying to get through a contraction. I had been sleeping peacefully to that point. Woke my husband up to have him time contractions and they were about 2-3 minutes apart. Because I was managing them so well, I still mentioned a few times that we might just have to go back to bed in a little bit, if it stopped.

What was the most challenging thing about going natural?

Listening to the doubt that would creep in and try to take over in the upcoming weeks. After my due date passed, I would have moments where I would wonder if my body was going to need help going into labor on its own. Even though I knew that mamas go overdue all the time. Once labor started, it was all so fast and I was birthing at home, so there wasn't much time or interruption to think. The house was so peaceful and no one bothered me.

What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?

Spending time daily envisioning my birth and following a healthy regimen for eating.

What surprised you about your birth?

How fast it was! 2.5 hours of labor. I woke up at 2:30 am with contractions 2-3 minutes apart and labored in the living room and bedroom until 4:30 am when my water broke on the living room floor. Baby boy was born at 4:50 am in my bathroom.

Also, that it was unassisted. We had been texting with the midwife, but because I was doing so well and chatting between contractions, I don't think myself or my husband and sister thought that I was as far along as I was. Even though my contractions were so close together. So when my water broke at 4:30 am, we called her right away but she didn't make it to our place until 15-20 minutes after he was born.

Once labor started, it was all so fast and I was birthing at home, so there wasn't much time or interruption to think. The house was so peaceful and no one bothered me.

What pain relief strategies worked best?

Moving around and leaning against the walls during contractions. I tried sitting on the birth ball and it felt awful, so I listened to my body and got right off. When I started to feel like the contractions were strong and might overtake me, I got on my hands and knees and rocked back and forth, moaning to a rhythm. Every mom needs to practice a rhythm, even if it's tapping your hand. They help so much in labor. Another helpful thing was to remind myself out loud that each wave would pass. Contractions were like riding a wave.

What position did you end up delivering in?

Once my water broke, I knew I was going to want to push soon, so I asked my husband to help me to the bathroom so I could sit on the toilet. It felt so natural to sit there and allowed me to not worry if I was making a mess in my home. As I felt the urge to push and a contraction rushed through me, I prayed out loud that God would give me a break so that I could get my perspective back. I also said something about just needing to give up control and let go. I did get a break from that contraction and knew that I was going to push the next time one rushed through my body. I asked my sister to start filling up the bathtub and told her not to get it hot. There was a longer break before the next contraction. I told my husband and sister that I was so hot; my husband opened the bathroom window and my sister looked around out in the other room and found a stiff manila envelope on my printer. She brought it into the bathroom to fan me with, but never used it as my next contraction started and I began to push. It felt right and I felt between my legs and could feel the baby’s head. I used the whole contraction to bare down and steadily push. My husband and sister tell me that they didn’t know I was pushing. The baby’s head came out and I eased back and waited. I stood up from sitting over the toilet. I was holding the head gently and it was so smooth and round. My hand kept stroking it gently and I remember saying to the baby, “Just wait a minute for me.” The head was so smooth and I was expecting to feel hair, so when I didn’t, I asked, “Is this the head?” For a fleeting moment, I wondered if it was a butt and I was delivering breech. My husband and sister both told me it was the baby’s head and I started right into the next contraction. Working to push slowly, the baby’s body slid right into my hands and I brought it to my chest. It was 4:50 am.

How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?

It was amazing to bring my baby from my body. It felt natural and right. Once the baby was in my arms, I walked across the floor and stepped into the tub. The baby had the cord looped around its arm and neck so I loosened the cord from its arm and my sister pulled it from the nape of its neck over the top of the head. My sister said, “It’s a boy.” We were all so joyful, especially my husband. My husband gave me a washcloth to wipe his face and chest. Ellis was moving well and was so peaceful. He had cried softly as he was coming out and after we had removed the nuchal cord, but he was calm as he lay in my lap in the water. We were all filled with so much love. It was still so quiet and calm in our house.

What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?

Research your options, read stories about beautiful natural births and get a doula if you want the support of someone that will trust your body completely! I have to say that, as I'm a doula ;)

My biggest advice is to determine what you are going to do and envision how you will do it!