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When did you realize you were really in labor?
After having prodromal on and off for three weeks, I woke up the morning of our due date after a night of infrequent contractions. I had an upset stomach, and contractions that were about 8 inutes apart for an hour after waking up. Then I experienced bloody show, which I experienced during my previous pregnancy when early labor began. I knew that this was it! The contractions continued to get closer together over the next hour, so we started making plans to head closer to the hospital since we live almost an hour away.
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
The hospital we delivered at has beautiful delivery rooms that include a shower or tub and birthing balls to use. Unfortunately, we were stuck in the tiny triage room downstairs until I was well into the transition phase. I requested to go upstairs to a delivery room several times, but the triage nurse brushed off my request each time. The last time I asked, she said "Since you're not getting an epidural there's really no reason you can't stay here." When I explained that I wanted to use the shower and a birthing ball she finally put in the order for me to be moved upstairs.
By the time we got there and my husband filled up the bath, I was so far into transition that I no longer wanted to get in the bath or use the ball. I was ready to push within an hour from that point.
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
I read all the positive birth stories I could online, listened to podcasts about natural births, and studied what other women said about epidural vs unmedicated births. With my first daughter I was given a shot of morphine during active labor, then got an epidural right as transition was starting. The birth itself went well, but I had a horrible recovery. Experiencing a quicker recovery was my main motivation for going without any medication this time.
I also wrote down some things to keep in mind during labor. I reminded myself that when it got to the point that I thought I couldn't do it, that meant I was almost done (which was true). I constantly reminded myself to relax my body and not tense up. I made low noises instead of screaming when I felt like I needed to make noise. I also countered any thoughts of "I can't do this" with "You are doing this, you can do this!" and "It's almost over, you're almost there."
Knowing what emotional signposts to expect during transition helped to. It helped me to know that once I felt like I couldn't cope that meant it was almost time to push. Also, knowing that feeling the urge to use the bathroom also meant it was time to push helped me convince the nurse and midwife that I really was ready to push. Until I told them exactly what I was feeling, they didn't take me seriously when I said "I feel ready to push." Once I said "I feel like I need to use the bathroom, I'm ready to push," they checked me and saw that I was almost completely effaced and dilated and let me start pushing on the next contraction.
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What surprised you about your birth?
That I never asked for an epidural or said anything out loud about not being able to do it. Even when I started to doubt I could do it, countering those thoughts with positive ones got me through. I was nervous up until the day I went into labor about whether or not I could really do it, but I did!
Also, I was surprised that I pushed for less than 5 minutes and had no tearing! She was out in about 5 pushes! With my first daughter, an epidural birth, I pushed for 30 minutes and had a first degree tear.
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Don't doubt that you can do it! Just because you feel nervous doesn't mean you can't do it. You're so much stronger than you realize. It was very intense and the hardest thing I've done, but I don't regret it for a second.
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
In active labor, breathing and focusing on something other than the pain, like the clouds in the sky, worked best. Once I hit transition, making low noises and getting into whatever position felt right at the moment helped some. For some contractions hands and knees worked best, for others side lying, and for some sitting on the edge of the bed worked best. I just went with what I felt my body needed me to do.
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What position did you end up delivering in?
I couldn't bear lying on my back, the position my ob wanted me to deliver in. Luckily, a midwife was on call who was willing to let me try other positions. She suggested trying lying on my side with my upper knee pulled up, which was bearable and how I delivered.
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
Just as surreal as my first birth! I didn't experience a burst of endorphin's or feeling like I could conquer the world at that moment like some people describe. I think I was still feeling a little stunned by the intensity of delivery, and relieved that I was done, but also still that "Wow, she's here! Look at her, she's here!" It's such an amazing and surreal moment.
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What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?
Don't doubt that you can do it! Just because you feel nervous doesn't mean you can't do it. You're so much stronger than you realize. It was very intense and the hardest thing I've done, but I don't regret it for a second. The pain really does have a purpose, and looking back I'm so thankful to have experienced it all. And the recovery was amazing compared to my first birth with an epidural. I felt like I hadn't even had a baby by the next day, and now 10 days postpartum I feel better than I did at 5 weeks postpartum before!
Learn as much as you can and remember that you can do it even when you think you can't. When you start to feel you can't do it anymore you really are almost done!
