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When did you realize you were really in labor?
I was one of the lucky few whose water broke, so I knew without a doubt that I was in labor. I was sitting with my husband on our living room chair and was in and out of sleep. He woke me up and we decided to head to bed. As soon as I got up from the chair I felt the typical "gush of water". I looked at my husband and very casually said "I think my water just broke", and moseyed into the bathroom. My husband followed with a very excited and unsure look on his face and said "are you sure?". I was. I held off for about and hour and called my midwife and doula to see what the next plan of action was. My contractions kicked in immediately and I went into my meditative state as soon as they started.
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What was the most challenging thing about going natural?
The nerves of feeling unprepared. I kept having mini mental meltdowns in my third trimester thinking that I had not practiced my meditating enough, or that my anxiety would take hold during labor. I must have asked my midwife at every appointment, "Even though I don't want an epidural, is there something that I can have if my anxiety kicks in?". The not knowing how the labor and delivery would go kept me a little nervous until labor actually began.
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What was the most helpful thing you did to prepare for childbirth?
Formulate my dream team. There is no way that I would have been able to accomplish this without the unwavering support of my husband, doula, midwives, and mother. Their belief in me from the beginning (even when MANY others didn't) kept my spirits and confidence high throughout my pregnancy. I will forever be grateful for all of their love during this transcendent time in my life.
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What surprised you about your birth?
How manageable the discomfort was. I never once even thought about asking about an epidural. I went into myself almost immediately once contractions started and did not get out of my meditative state throughout the entire labor. I was so surrendered to the entire experience that I was able to sleep between contractions. When I was feeling anxious during pregnancy and would ask about anxiety medication that I could use during labor, my once midwife would say "I find that when it comes time, mothers really step up and rise to the occasion". That's exactly what happened in my case, I was never once anxious, I had full confidence in myself throughout the entire labor and delivery of my son.
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Your body is able and you are fully capable.
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What pain relief strategies worked best?
Counter pressure and laboring in the shower were lifesavers! I had our doula and my husband working simultaneously on my lower back to decrease my back labor. I must have labored for 2-3 hours in the shower on 2-3 separate occasions. Also, hot packs were my best friend! I probably went through 50 hot packs for my abdomen and lower back. Oh, and low guttural moans were key. I didn't think I would be into making noise while in labor but when my doula suggested it and I tried it, it was a game changer.
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What position did you end up delivering in?
I pushed trying every position known to man! I tried the birthing bar, I tried on my side, I tried in the shower, I tried on the toilet, I even tried the old stand by on my back! I ended up delivering in the bed, but not on my back. They had a table that the end dropped out so I ended up delivering in the bed but in a seated position.
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How did it feel to hold your baby for the first time?
I will say that holding my baby for the first time was not as monumental and life changing as I expected that it would be. After a 23 hour labor, with 5 hours of pushing (yes, 5), I was exhausted and all I truly wanted was for my husband to just hold me. He came out covered in meconium, and that was a level of unease that I was not expecting. I held him for about 15 seconds and then they whisked him away to the corner of the room, where I could hear a baby nurse panicking which was not very professional in my opinion. My amazing midwife kept reassuring me that he would be just fine and I had every bit of trust in what she said. She was still working on me for another 40 minutes, to get my placenta and the umbilical cord out. I didn't get to hold him until after all that. He was 8.5 pounds (which feels like a toddler if you're expecting a 6-7 pound baby like my midwife thought) and just perfect. However, unlike my husband who immediately got some skin to skin time with him, I felt like I didn't fully bond until I started breastfeeding him and after I got a little rest.
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What advice can you give to other mamas who want to go natural?
-Your body is able and you are fully capable.
-Putting in the time to prepare is all good and well but it might be very different than you expected and much more manageable.
-Build a dream team! If you don't have a partner, get a doula... If you do have a partner, get a doula!
-Create a calm space. The whole time I was laboring I was moaning, the lights were dim, had some nature sounds on and all the nurses and midwives kept commenting on what a great calm space we had created. Their confidence in me made me confident!
